Wiper and lights problems

   I have a problem where the front and back wipers are not working. The washer fluid works on the front but not on the back. The fuses, relays, wiper motor and rear washer motor are all good. Then while hunting and pecking for a possible bad wire, loose ground etc the lights started acting up. Approximately 5+ years ago the wipers had a mind of their own and the wiper motor was replaced and they worked until now. The wiper motor was replaced this time but didn't resolve the problem. The headlights and interior lights stay on but with interior light dial in the on position and I turn the high beams on then off the low beams go off. Then if I turn the dial for interior light all the way down to turn them off the low beams come back on and this is without the headlight switch being on and I've switched out the relays but when the low beams are off if you tap the the low beam relay they come on. When it was bought Dodge put in an alarm but it was still considered an aftermarket. A friend took the alarm out (wanted it out anyway) thinking it might be part or all of the problem and when he did the wipers started working. When he had to leave I was cleaning up and thought oh I want to see those wipers work, I've waited so long and....... they don't work. I checked today to see if anything was different and while leaving the wiper switch on they came on twice during maybe a 15 minute time period. Also if you take the wire harness for the wipers and pull it apart then just slightly touch it together the wipers come on temporarily. If you take a light probe and touch the green /white wire you hear the relay click. After you hear the relay click and then slightly touch the wire harness again the wipers will come on. When you touch the wire and the relay clicks it stays that way for 7 seconds and then clicks off and touching the wire harness after that the wipers won't work until the grn/wh wire is touched again. Most people lean towards a bad wire/ground and a few lean towards the bcm. My mom (it's her van) is 75 with diabetes and other health issues and I'm totally disabled after a very bad work related accident so money is non existent which means we can't afford a mechanic. There's some things I can do/check myself but with my injuries and serious chronic pain I'm sort of limited to what I can do and how long I can do it. I know it's a crazy one and others have had sort of the same problems but none of their fixes have worked. Any and all help would be greatly appreciated. Thanks!!!